Wednesday, March 5, 2014

I’ve given myself some time to think about it and I came to the decision that I’m not doing Lent this year.  For many of my friends and community, Lent is a time of prayer, penance, repentance, atonement and a time to give up something.  This giving up of certain luxuries is part of a solemn reflection recalling the sacrifice, the death and ultimately resurrection of Jesus.  There are beautiful rituals and lovely traditions that happen during this period in the liturgical calendar.  Even for people who don’t attend church often, it’s a time of year where they get to press the reset button.  

In many ways I feel like the traditions and rituals of Lent no longer fit with the relationship I have with the Devine.  I’m sure this is in large part because of all I’ve been through.  Cancer, a near fatal accident at the age of 12, liver failure, facial paralysis, parents nearly dying and then going crazy, multi million dollar law suits, homelessness… these were all things that had me on my knees begging for a little gentleness. 

And then that prayer was answered when Jack came along.  When I married Jack the one vow he asked me to promise him was that I would endeavor to be happy.  I’ve really worked hard, daily, to honor that request and my promise.  This path of choosing happiness doesn’t always sit well with other people.  That's been sobering.  I am, however, learning that other people’s opinion of me and how I live my life is really none of my business.  What is my business is our home which is peace-filled... and my husband, who is content, and our life... which is full of blessings.  

I have no desire to give anything up this year.  A lot of people give up sweets or something food related.  Since I’m trying to have a better relationship with food, one that's not so adversarial, I decided I would just continue to work on awareness like I have been for a couple months now.  This seems to be benefitting me (currently I'm over 10 pounds down from Christmas).  I have no desire to add anything either.  Sometimes folks will suggest an alternative for Lent and rather than giving something up, add something like meditation, community service, or a new habit you've been wanting to work on.  Yeah, I’m already working on stuff.  A lot of stuff. 

So I'm gonna sit this one out.  I think God will gladly write me a free pass.  

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